Crime Scene

Crime Scene

Amy popped back to London for the night to surprise her sister who is spending a few nights with her folks en-route to a work reccy in Rome.

So naturally I fell into default alone mode…supermarket for supper, then beers and sparkling wine (@ £1.80p for very decent fizz, it would be an insult not to) to settle down to the rugby 6 Nations this afternoon.

Still an hour to go before kick off, so I took my book down to the terrace by the beach to get some rays, layered up for winter wind but the sun was good.

As I lay there, a foxy local chica approached me and asked if I had wi-fi access from the apartments. I of course didn’t understand her, so she rephrased in good English.

I watched her return to the quiet beach, her daughter and I assumed her mother. I in turn returned to my Sebastian Faulk.

Within minutes, and directly before me, she had removed all her clothes except her G-string and attempted the sea, which was obviously much too cold.

She then withdrew, dried her feet off and moved towards a large rock near me, squatted against the rock, pulled back her string and took a piss.

Of course at this point my glasses were hitched upon my head and I focused not on Sebastian's words, but the wintry beach before me.

Having relieved herself, she stepped over to the waters edge and rinsed her pee hand…perhaps ironically…I’m not sure?

Needless to say, I was impressed.

Her bohemian brazenness moved me. It was sunny sure, but not hot and she had removed everything but her skimpy nicks and proceeded to piss against a rock in front of me…

She was obviously I was still there...watching, which left me wondering if this was:

A)   A simple territorial tagging, like a dog marking its patch?

B)   A busy woman getting caught short, realising the sea was just too cold for a sneaky ‘woman pretending to swim’ pees, whilst forgetting there was an onlooker just yards away?

C)   A flirtatious Mediterranean display, put on for my benefit….

Yeah think C’s the one, …..and I’ve still got it, eh? Women still get urge to piss themselves when they meet me!